1. That time at the beginning of the relationship when I treated you like a queen/king/etc. was mostly just to lure you in.
2. I’m not in love with you. I’m in love with an idea I have in my head based on you, and also some fantasies I’ve had.
3. You’re not crazy. I just want you to think that.
4. Sometimes I get a glimpse of the reality of my behavior, but it’s too scary, so I shut it down and keep treating you the way I treat you.
5. I actually believe that it’s your job to meet my needs.
6. Your social support system terrifies me.
7. I hurt you because I want power and control, and I want power and control because it feels good and I’m insecure, scared, and weak.
8. I want you to believe that if you work hard enough you can fix the relationship, but that’s all a lie.
9. I keep telling you that you disappoint me because I want to keep you unstable and on the defensive.
10. Being alone is better than being with me.
(feel free to add more)
11. I will make arguments that are actually diametrically opposed to each other if that’s what it takes to see myself as a decent reasonable person who has been burdened by you. Pointing this out will enrage me.
And even if you are crazy, that doesn’t justify any of the things I’m doing to you.
12. You do not deserve to be treated like this. Nothing could ever make you deserve it.
13. Not all abusive relationships entail physical abuse.
14. I am calculatedly manipulative. I know what I’m doing. Everything I do and say, whether kind or cruel, is for a reason: to sustain my control over you.
15. I am a liar. I will always lie to you.